Thursday, March 08, 2007

Staying Power

Apparently I have staying power.

According to Kristylaughed, I'm the kind of person who sees things through.

Which is a blessing and a curse I suppose.

I want to be the kind of person that sees things through to the end. But how do you know when to cut your losses? How do you know when enough is enough? If the decision is all yours, how do you know what the right decision is? How do you know that it's an ok decision? How do you know that it's ok to just wash your hands of the problem? Or do you just stsick it out, hope for the best and to hades with the consequences?

There's been a lot going on recently that's made me really seriously consider my future and what it holds for me. I know that I need to make a decision and soon, but in the words of Sara Groves, "I'm caught between the promise and the things I know."

I've gotten comfortable.

I like certain things, I'm seeing growth and change.

And Yet.

There's the soul-breaking side. The straw that's close to breaking my back, the thing that makes me wonder about my perseverance, the thing that makes me turn on "Painting Pictures of Egypt" and hit the repeat button. The thing that makes me think that I should give up on seeing it through.

Either decision is heart-breaking.

Pray for me.


Jamie Lynn said...

Hannie Lou, I'm always praying for you, you know that. And I'm sorry I've been so busy lately that we haven't gotten a chance to talk. I do miss you dearly and hope to talk very soon. Just think-- this time next week we'll be together in St Louis :) I love you!