Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Ladder Climber

I want to be a ladder climber but I think my first rung is broken :)

Anyway, so my friend lindsey and I were talking the other night about levels that people are on relationally. We both agree that we do well with the people who are single--people on our level.

Then comes the people who are dating--on a separate level, but we can relate to them b/c 1)they still stress about boys--though its usually the same one and 2) they haven't climbed another rung. It's just one rung ahead of us.

Then there's the engaged people... another level b/c it implies commitment, but really not so far off that it changes things, and there's still the hope that we can catch up.

then comes marriage. This is the point where I stop relating because I don't understand it, I haven't been to the point where I say "I want to marry this man". And I'm not just talking about the wedding itself, because quite honestly, I can dress myself up in a white dress and pick 6 friends to dress up in the same dress, but i dont have the guy that made the commitment that makes me want to wear a white dress and pick 6 friends to dress up in the same dresses. I don't have the guy that wants to spend forever with me. I can't imagine the benefits of marriage having never experienced the benefits of a real relationship. That's like 5 ladder rungs ahead of me. I can't climb that fast and really, I'd probably displace a hip trying.

After marriage things change. Priorities shift, and people start to grow up. They start thinking in pairs, start finding couples to be friends with, start having babies (another level I dont even want to think about!) and start hanging out with families! It amazes me that there are people my age who have babies (people who i knew single, dating, engaged, married, and now parents) and all this time I have been single, single, single, single. I'm not complaining, b/c God has taught me patience and has taught me the blessing of friends I might not have learned if I had been married with babies by now. However, it does seem like I'm stuck in level one while friends are moving up to levels 6 and 7 and then it gets harder to hold close to them.

So to all my first ladder rung level friends--thanks for sticking it out on the bottom rung :)


Jess said...

I'm with you on that first rung. Thank you for sticking with me. You're the greatest. I can't wait until we're both in the same city and it actually feels like we live close to each other.

Dutch Not German said...

What if I don't even have a ladder?

Jamie said...

Bottom-Rungers of the World, UNITE!